Community: Blogs
In the words of Military Academy Professor Morten Ender, "Every family in the military knows a male spouse. But they only know one."
Being a male MilSpouse can be a lonely place. The DOD estimates that only 6 -7% of Military Spouses are male - and the websites, the spouse groups, the events geared toward Military Wives (even if they're sure to say 'spouse') - can make it seem like even less. So what's a guy to do?
This week, Vets Prevail is doing a 3-part series on being a male Military Spouse. Today, in Part 1, we'll talk about its challenges. In Part 2, we'll discuss where to find support, why you might relate to the Spouse Club after all, and (surprise!), the benefits of being a male MilSpouse. Finally, in Part 3, we'll provide useful links and MilBlogs for Military Husbands.
In a lot of ways, being a male MilSpouse is an entirely different situation than being a military wife. To begin with, being the sole male in a group full of women tends to make you the 'token husband' - and that can get old fast. You're not just the token husband-in-the-Spouse-Club, either - when you're around the troops, you're the token guy-without-uniform. It's great to be unique, of course, but being a novelty gets tiring after a while!
This can be especially challenging for stay-at-home dads. Having a wife who is the breadwinner in what remains a very traditional, male dominated setting, can be a delicate situation. And, again, being the lone man out of uniform doesn't exactly make you inconspicuous. For those of you without kids, all of the cross-country transfers and uncertainty of military life can make it difficult to pursue a satisfying career - a problem experienced by Military Wives, as well.
I can't leave out jealousy, either. Knowing that your wife is one of few women working with men day in and day out can be a tough thing for even the most confident man to accept. But if you take any of our advice, take this piece: Try, at all costs, to avoid succumbing to jealousy. It has a tendency to run away with your thoughts, and take healthy communication with it - the last thing a Military marriage needs.
For more advice, check back later this week for Part 2: Finding Support as a Military Husband
